Yes. Here we go! Delicious, delicious water. Oh, ho, ho, ho, ho! Happy Thursday, everyone. So let's get into the holiday spirit and bomb Mexico. Hear me out. It's not really about Mexico, it's about fentanyl. It's killing our nation's youngest people like crazy. 

More than 75% of adolescent overdose deaths last year were actually fentanyl poisonings, not overdoses. It's so bad, schools are loading up on Narcan, a drug used to reverse overdoses. And much like Brian Kilmeade's book, you can get it free in vending machines, just causes you to throw up. It's amazing. 

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But Narcan is really just a Band-Aid for a crisis that's hemorrhaging lives. And yes, I can tell you that drugs are bad, but it won't change anyone's mind. I'm sorry. I can't imagine my teenage self watching clips of Hunter Biden cutting up lines on a stripper's butt and thinking, "Hey, I want no part of that." I could crack an egg over a skillet and say, "This is your brain on drugs," but I know it's just a trick to get me to cook. And you guys don't come here for that anyway, you come here for the thoughtful commentary and practical advice delivered by one ridiculously good-looking host and four other normal people.

So the first step in stopping the drug crisis is to address the supply. It's time to take out cartels in Mexico, bomb the ---- out of them. It'll be over in minutes. The president's morning B.M. lasts longer, and if the operation starts up somewhere else, you bomb that, too. Mowing down cartels would be no different than mowing the lawn. And in a short time, you might be surprised how willing the cartel might be in reconsidering their investments in fentanyl. They're businessmen, after all. So just change their benefit risk analysis, because right now, using drugs entails way more risk than making them. That's not how it's supposed to be, it has to be the reverse. If a cartel head can never unpack a suitcase or figure out if that weird whistling noise is a teakettle or an incoming missile, maybe they'll reassess the fentanyl revenue stream. 

Now, bombing seems harsh, considered that we've invaded countries for far less. Remember Grenada in '83? We turned that place, into a Sandals Resort in about 6 minutes. And why? Concern for 600 US medical students on the island? Sure, a lot of them are smoking hot nurses, but that's not my point. That's nothing compared to the 100,000 deaths each year tied to cartels. Or how about Panama in '89? We went after Noriega because he was wanted on drug trafficking. I assure you, it wasn't homemade Clearasil he was pushing. Cheap shot. How about Yugoslavia in '99? You remember that, huh? Coincidentally, when Bill Clinton got caught misusing cigars, he killed people for less. 

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So when protected cartels kill 100,000 Yanks a year, how is that not already a war? And it doesn't matter if Mexico won't agree, when their cartels are free to invade us anyway. We didn't ask Pakistan if we could drop in and kill Bin Laden. So that takes care of the supply. But what about demand? Well, we could sew every Hollywood nostril shut, that cuts demand by about 80%. But really, we have to finally admit that the desire for recreational oblivion is basically unkillable.

Unfortunately, despite the risks, drugs feel good to people and provide an escape. It even goes back to caveman times. I mean, what else was there to do there? It's not like they had Netflix, and if they did, the reaction to it would be the same as ours is today, screw this crap I'm going to smoke some dinosaur droppings. That's why they disappeared. We know laws won't change this facet of human behavior. Alcohol just got there first, so we accept it. Despite the vehicular homicide, domestic battery and celebrity liver transplants. But we all have a right to relief, especially anyone who works for The View. Legalize drugs just for that reason. 

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But if we keep restricting, say, prescribe pain relievers, a black market will thrive and those drugs will come with deadly risks. Remember, kids aren't buying fentanyl, they're trying other things which are poisoned with this stuff. Since the tiniest amount is super lethal, it's easier to smuggle and cheaper to use as an ingredient and a wall won't stop it unless it's lined with armed soldiers. You could throw a lethal bundle right over it. Well, unless you're Dr. Fauci.

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Figured we needed a laugh there. It reminds me of when Dr. Jill throws Joe's teeth at him. Yeah. After finding them tangled in her niece's hair. Disgusting. 

But fentanyl is so easy to smuggle because a block the size of a Snickers could flatten California. Not a bad idea. I'm kidding, I still have family there, for now. So that's my plan, bomb the supply, reduce harm among the demand by availing safer, clean alternatives. That gives us a fighting chance because we've lost the war on drugs. So now it's time to save some lives.

"A Charlie Brown Christmas," a beloved holiday television tradition for generations of American families, debuted to overwhelming popular acclaim despite network fears of failure on this day in history, Dec. 9, 1965. 

Expectations were low for its success, according to several accounts of the history of the broadcast.

CBS executives were underwhelmed by the slow pace of the production; and the network had battled behind the scenes with "Peanuts" creator Charles M. Schulz over the inclusion of a scene lifted straight from the New Testament.

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The animation was quirky. There was no laugh track. Actual children, not trained voice actors, spoke for the characters. 

Peter Robbins, the voice of Charlie Brown, was just nine years old at the time. (Robbins died in January 2022 at age 65). 

Despite the fears, the American public absolutely adored "A Charlie Brown Christmas" from the moment it reached their antennas.

"On Thursday, December 9, 1965, over 15 million households tuned in to judge for themselves," wrote Smithsonian Magazine in a treatise on the history of the program.

"The reception would turn the special into a classic. CBS soon learned that nearly half of American television sets had watched what the network thought would be a flop."

"A Charlie Brown Christmas" continues to warm the spirits of millions of people around the world each holiday season. 

Several surveys place it as America's favorite Christmas special.

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The seemingly simple children's cartoon is a deceptively rich and layered piece of American art. 

"A Charlie Brown Christmas" pairs innovative animation techniques with a critically acclaimed jazz soundtrack, while its grade-school-age characters struggle with the very mature topic of the real meaning of Christmas amid an overtly commercial society. 

Children love the cast of characters with unique personalities who inhabit a world that appears to have no adults. 

The "Peanuts" gang were first popularized by Schulz in his syndicated comic strip that debuted in 1950. 

Adults enjoy the reminders of childhood. Many find themselves grappling with the very same struggle — to find purpose in a holiday whose spiritual foundations appear to face greater attack each year.

"Look, Charlie, let's face it. We all know that Christmas is a big commercial racket," cynical Lucy says as the Peanuts gang attempts to produce a Christmas play. 

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"It's run by a big Eastern syndicate, you know."

The bouncy and spirited Vince Guaraldi Trio tune "Linus & Lucy" plays as Charlie Brown is ordered to find "a great big shiny aluminum Christmas tree … maybe painted pink" to set the holiday spirit. 

The Guaraldi soundtrack features 11 jazz recordings, a deft combination of instrumentals and vocal tunes. 

It features original compositions from the California jazz pianist ("Skating" and others), a Beethoven masterpiece ("Fur Elise"), a traditional folk tune ("O Tannenbaum") and a Mel Torme pop holiday classic ("The Christmas Song"). 

"The genius of ‘A Charlie Brown Christmas’ was the way it channeled the looming sadness and anxiety that come with the holidays," Rolling Stone wrote in a 50th-anniversary retrospective of the Guaraldi recordings in 2015. 

"Its timeless, best-selling soundtrack by the Vince Guaraldi Trio tapped into that narrative seamlessly, with muted, melancholic jazz."

The foundation of the program's popularity, however, is its open embrace of the birth of Christ — a fact curiously overlooked in most children's Christmastime specials about magical snowmen and flying reindeer. 

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"A Charlie Brown Christmas" reaches its climax as the frustrated title character screams out: "Isn't there anyone who knows what Christmas is all about?!"

Linus responds with a dramatic Shakespearean moment. 

"Sure, Charlie Brown. I can tell you what Christmas is all about."

He takes the stage by himself, under a spotlight, and proceeds to quote verbatim the Christmas story as it appears in the King James Version of the Book of Luke.

"And there were in the same country shepherds abiding in the field, keeping watch over their flock by night.

"And, lo, the angel of the Lord came upon them, and the glory of the Lord shone round about them: and they were sore afraid.

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"And the angel said unto them, Fear not: for, behold, I bring you good tidings of great joy, which shall be to all people.

"For unto you is born this day in the city of David a Savior, which is Christ the Lord.

"And this shall be a sign unto you; Ye shall find the babe wrapped in swaddling clothes, lying in a manger.

"And suddenly there was with the angel a multitude of the heavenly host praising God, and saying, ‘Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace, good will toward men.’"

Linus follows his biblical soliloquy by announcing to his now spirited friend: "And that, Charlie Brown, is what Christmas is all about." 

The gang then gathers around Charlie Brown's once-ugly and withering but now loved and lush beautiful little Christmas tree, embracing the birth of the Savior. 

"Hark the herald angels sing; glory to the newborn King," the Peanuts gang sings triumphantly as the credits roll.

"No ‘Good grief! at the end," The Christian Chronicle wrote in a review of the timeless TV classic.

"Just the silent recognition of good grace, God’s grace, through the gift of his infant son, Christ the Lord, the greatest miracle of them all."