In a scene that plays out like a deleted subplot from “Veep,” a man asked President Trump to sign his Presidential Lifetime Achievement Award, which had previously been signed by former President Biden.

The unidentified recipient, who presumably spent 4,000 hours of his life volunteering—only to have his reward signed by a mechanical ghost—approached President Trump with a request that has now redefined the term “cancel culture.” Holding the certificate, which bore the signature of former President Joe Biden, the man didn’t just ask for an autograph; he asked for an exorcism.

“I don’t want his name on there,” the man pleaded, looking at the document with the same level of affection one might give a subpoena. “Can you help me out?”

President Trump, never one to miss an opportunity to play both commander in chief and forensic handwriting expert, immediately took the stage. After confirming with the crowd that the man indeed wanted the 46th president’s John Hancock scrubbed from existence, Trump went to work.

“And mine’s not an autopen,” Trump declared. “His is. That’s an autopen signature. See that? You know, that’s an autopen.”

Trump then pivoted, “That’s an autopen signature. You think he signed that? He didn’t sign that. I don’t know how he did that. It’s insulting, when you think about it.” He finished signing, adding, “Now you have a real lifetime achievement award.”

LOL. A man in Georgia who received a Presidential Lifetime Achievement Award from Biden crossed out Biden's name and asked Trump to sign it instead

“I don’t want his [Biden’s] name on there. So can you help me out?”pic.twitter.com/5KWyw1s49E

— Libs of TikTok (@libsoftiktok) February 19, 2026

After it came to light Biden had used an autopen, the former president flatly denied any impropriety. “I made the decisions,” he insisted, calling claims otherwise “ridiculous and false.” Congressional Republicans, led by figures like House Oversight Chairman James Comer, remained unconvinced and launched inquiries.

But at least one American volunteer has already rendered his verdict.

When given the choice between a presidential signature and what Trump has called “a machine,” he opted for ink.

Some awards come with a gold seal.

This one came with a Sharpie — and the comforting knowledge that at least one signature in Washington that day doesn’t require batteries.

In another overtime nail-biter for the United States, the women’s hockey team defeated Canada to capture their third Olympic gold medal.

Since women’s hockey made its Olympic debut in 1998, only Canada and the United States have won gold in the event, and this year was no exception. The rivalry was on full display in the arena Thursday when the teams competed in the finals for the seventh time — with Canada having won five of them. But this year, it was America’s turn.

After a scoreless opening period, Kristin O’Neill broke the deadlock for Canada and they took the 1-0 lead into the third. The gold was just within reach.

The arena then erupted when Hilary Knight tied the game 1-1 — adding to her own Olympic resume — with just two minutes remaining in regulation. When the third period ended, the teams headed to 3-on-3 sudden-death overtime, a 20-minute period played until the first goal.

But overtime didn’t last long. Just four minutes into the extra frame, Megan Keller danced around Claire Thompson and flipped the puck past goaltender Ann-Renee Desbiens for the game-winner.

TEAM USA TAKES GOLD 🥇

Megan Keller wins it in overtime, helping the U.S. to a 2-1 victory over Canada.

🎥 @NBCOlympics | #WinterOlympicspic.twitter.com/1xXQvOnNII

— The Athletic (@TheAthletic) February 19, 2026

Team USA dominated throughout the tournament until Canada pushed them into a tightly contested championship — but it just wasn’t enough to derail the Americans.

“It was a hard-fought game. Canada gave us their best and they’re an incredible team. Their goaltending was outstanding. A lot of offense, a lot of great defense, so it was hard,” Keller said after the game. “But really proud of the way our group stuck together. We fought to get into OT and just happy to finish it off.”

The rival win must feel extra sweet this year, since the last Winter Games in 2022 resulted in a silver medal against Canada. But for six of Team USA’s players, including Knight, who has said these Olympic games will be her last, this is their second gold medal.

As for the men’s hockey team, they will compete against Slovakia in the semifinals on Friday. If they win, they have a shot at competing — possibly against Canada — to win their first Olympic gold since 1980.