The GOP-led Senate rejected on Friday a measure that sought to stop President Donald Trump from launching further attacks on Iran without the consent of Congress.

Sen. Tim Kaine’s (D-VA) war powers resolution was defeated in a 53-47 vote, mostly along party lines. Sen. Rand Paul (R-KY) was the sole Republican to vote “yea” while Sen. John Fetterman (D-PA) joined the rest of the GOP in opposing it.

“The Framers of our Constitution gave Congress the power to declare war because they believed that the decision to send our nation’s men and women in uniform into harm’s way was too big for any one person. The Trump Administration’s chaotic strategy on Iran confused the American people and created significant risks for servicemembers and their families,” Kaine said in a statement.

“I am disappointed that many of my colleagues are not willing to stand up and say Congress needs to be part of a decision as important as whether or not the U.S. should send our nation’s sons and daughters to fight against Iran,” he added. “I will continue to do all I can to keep presidents of any party from starting wars without robust public debate by Congress.”

Trump ordered military strikes on three sites in Iran last weekend as part of an effort to prevent Tehran from achieving nuclear weapons. Although the president deemed the operation a success and called for peace following a counterattack on a U.S. military base in Qatar with no American casualties, he warned on Friday that the United States would bomb Iran again if it resumed enriching uranium to high levels.

In a statement released after the vote, Sen. Susan Collins (R-MA) argued that Congress did not need to give Trump authorization at this time.

“Since the despicable attacks on October 7, 2023, Iran has continued to use proxies and empowered terrorist groups to attack American servicemembers and our ally Israel. This week, Iran threatened to attack Americans on our own soil and around the world,” Collins said. “I supported the President’s targeted strike on Iran’s pursuit of nuclear capabilities because a nuclear-armed Iran would pose an unacceptable threat to America and our allies. I also applaud the current ceasefire. Given this backdrop, it is the wrong time to consider this resolution and to risk inadvertently sending a message to Iran that the President cannot swiftly defend Americans at home and abroad.”

“There has always been a Constitutional tension between Article I vesting in Congress the power to declare war and Article II designating the President as Commander-in-Chief,” she added. “I continue to believe that Congress has an important responsibility to authorize the sustained use of military force. That is not the situation we are facing now. The President has the authority to defend our nation and our troops around the world against the threat of attack.”

Some lawmakers in the Republican-controlled House are pushing for another war powers vote, but Speaker Mike Johnson (R-LA) told reporters that he did not think it was necessary.

“I don’t think this is an appropriate time for a war powers resolution, and I don’t think it’s necessary. Listen, for 80 years, presidents of both parties have acted with the same commander in chief authority under Article 2” of the Constitution, Johnson said.

Johnson went on to mention how Democrats who are complaining now did not seem to mind when former Presidents Joe Biden and Barack Obama conducted military operations in the region without seeking explicit approval from Congress for those campaigns.

“You had President Biden use it three times in Middle East operations. President Obama went on an eight-month campaign bombing Libya to take down the regime there. I never heard a Democrat balk about any of that,” Johnson said. “And suddenly now they’re just up in arms. It’s all politics. This is not a time for politics.”

The New York Times, a former newspaper, recently ran a story with this headline: “Men, Where Have You Gone? Please Come Back.” The sub-headline was: “So many men have retreated from intimacy, hiding behind firewalls, filters and curated personas, dabbling and scrolling. We miss you.”

Now, I know what you’re thinking. You’re thinking, “Oh, Klavan, you smoking hot hunk of hilarity, a joke is a joke, but do you really expect us to believe that that was a headline in the same former newspaper that has spent the last forty years denigrating men and marriage and promoting a sexual culture of such degrading perversion that it could only be intended to cause even a fully operational male to recoil horrified from sexual communion as if he were Ben Affleck in the moment he suddenly realized he had left the really nice Jennifer for the Jennifer with the admittedly spectacular body but with the kind of personality that could make even a fully operational male recoil horrified from sexual communion as if he’d spent the last forty years reading the New York Times?” And okay, sure, even I’ve forgotten where that sentence began, but the point is, no, I’m not making this up.

This article wondering why men had retreated from intimacy into a world of solitary stimulation utterly devoid of emotional content was written by Rachel Drucker, a woman who spent part of her career working for Playboy and its affiliated hard core porn outlets, enticing men to retreat from intimacy into a world of solitary stimulation utterly devoid of emotional content. She writes (and this is a real quote, I’m still not even making stuff up yet): “I remember when part of heterosexual male culture involved showing up with a woman to signal something — status, success, desirability. Women were once signifiers of value, even to other men. That dynamic has quietly collapsed.”

So — baffled by this mystery — the New York Times did what they usually do in such circumstances: they sent their reporters to find out what men think, by interviewing women.

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For instance, they spoke with Karen Screamy-Hate-Face, President of the Society for Harridans who are Intolerably Loud, or S-H-R-I-L. Ms. Screamy-Hate-Face said, “I can’t for the life of me figure out why I can’t get a date with one of these toxic snakes. I’ve got the pink hat, all the right tattoos and plenty of insight on how to make men be better than they are. What do those bastards want from me? Tenderness?”

The Times also interviewed the holder of the Guinness Book World Record for highest body count, Karen Spikenose, who told them, “Frankly, I think most men are just too sexually insecure. They’re always afraid I’m going to compare them to all the men I slept with yesterday. But really, I’m the sort of girl who usually takes each man separately. It’s more time-consuming, but I feel it makes for a more intimate seven minutes.”

And they interviewed divorce attorney Karen Crotchfangs, who told us, “I just think men don’t know what they really want. They say they want a feminine girl like me who gets all made up for a date and wears pretty dresses and lets them pay for dinner, but then the minute they see my penis they run for the hills. Sometimes without even finishing their drink.”

In the end, however, despite its considerable reportorial power, the New York Times somehow could not solve the mystery of why men no longer feel that women add value to their lives.

Now, part of our job here at the Daily Wire is to bring you the kind of material that outlets like the New York Times simply can’t provide. Like journalism. So we immediately sent our reporters out into the field, and when they didn’t come back from the field but simply went prancing off across the grass picking flowers and weaving garlands of daisies for one another’s heads, we sent out some more reporters to interview a prominent man on why he had retreated from intimacy. Unfortunately, the man just kept sobbing violently and crying out, “What was I thinking? I could have had the nice Jennifer!”

* * *

This excerpt is taken from the opening satirical monologue of “The Andrew Klavan Show.”

Andrew Klavan is the host of “The Andrew Klavan Show” at The Daily Wire. Klavan is the bestselling author of numerous books, including the Cameron Winter Mystery series. The fourth installment, “A Woman Underground.” His most recent nonfiction release is “The Kingdom of Cain: Finding God in the Literature of Darkness.” (May 2025, Zondervan/HarperCollins). Follow him on X: @andrewklavan

The views expressed in this satirical article are those of the author and do not necessarily represent those of The Daily Wire.